Dr Watford's Casebook #6
Dr Watford almost spat his long 'easy on the froth` skinny flat white down his finest M&S tailoring on the commuter express to boredom this morning when he turned back the pages of the Daily Redtop to read 'Puff Daddy to buy Crystal Palace`…
According to the Current Bun, American rapper P Diddy is showing some serious interest in becoming the latest filthy rich foreign owner of a football team and is preparing to splash some of his £360m fortune on 'a shock bid' for those cash strapped Eagles at Crystal Palace….
'Sources` even reckon 'Diddy has been in London meeting football fixers… he's just deciding who he thinks he'll make a bid for.'
Hmmm, ok so it might just be the most bizarre rumour Dr Watford has ever heard (dare we say 'Ludicris`?) and the good doctor doesn`t even know if the Hornets are on the hip hop moguls radar (it`d be great though huh?)… but hey, here at VitalWatford, well just had to have our say.
After all - Wet Wet Wet might well argue - but with Watford being one of the first clubs (if not the first) in the land to have a decorated, flamboyant musical genius of an owner in Sir Elton, who can argue with Hornet fans pedigree to comment…
In fact that 'pedigree` might just be a bit too hot to hotstep for the Sun`s 'source` to compete with, after said 'source` insisted that P Diddy was attracted to cash strapped Palace because 'he liked the name'… (er, something to do with Cristal apparently).
Which, here at VitalWatford Towers, has got Dr Watford thinking about the shape of the Championship table if the eager ranks of America`s finest Gangsta Rappers were to ride into town ready to flash their bling on Bristol City or dump their filthy lucre at London Road, Peterborough…
Would we see a league littered with:
Q P R Kelly ?
Kayne West Bromwich Albion ?
Notorious P.N.E ?
Snoop Derby Dogg ?
Personally, Dr Watford is looking forward to away day visits to the TuPac Stadium in Scunthorpe but admittedly, can`t really see 50-Cent mc`ing on the pitch, mic in hand, shouting 'Enjooooooy da game' as kick off approached.
Nor can VitalWatford`s editor be particularly sure that the regulars at Sheffield United would be impressed if Lil` Kim kicked off a rather scratched rendition of the Blade`s infamous 'Chip Butty` terrace anthem.
And there can be no question of JayZ taking a turn on the tannoy, announcing the winner of the '50:50 half time cash draw`…. 'It`s my man, Trevor in da East Stand… ya get me'.
As, our friend Dizzy Rascal once said (so eloquently in fact).. it`s all 'Bonkers'.