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Blackpool got Ian Holloway`s tangerine dream off to a flyer with a 4-0 win over Unibond league outfit Burscough whilst Doncaster started their pre-Richie Wellens era with a 3-2 clos run thing over Arnthorpe Welfare.

Forest, on the other hand, had new signing Paul Anderson to thank as they pulled off a highly credible 1-0 win in Sporting Lisbon and they weren`t the only side to win against decent opposition. Oh no, Barnsley came out on top of a 3-2 thriller versus Hungarian giants Ferencavros at Oakwell.

Elsewhere, and Palace joined Watford in making it a miserable double header weekend for Borehamwood. Neil Warnock`s men ran out 4-0 winners on the Friday night before the Hornets hit another 4 (a couple for Golden Graham on his debut) 24 hours later (though the 'Wood did grab a consolution).

Scunthorpe reckon their "battleplan is going well" after beating Botteford Town 2-1 and Newcastle believe "their quality began to tell" as Sheila Ameobi and Nile Ranger were amongst the scorers as the Toon beat Shamrock Rovers, 3-0.

Hey, who needs lil` Mickey Owen for goals anyway?

Posh got one over Rochdale in er, Marbella as Fergie signed a 4 year deal in front of Barry Fry (it won`t stop him being linked with every managerial vacancy for the next 15 years mind you) and Swansea saw off Portuguese side CD Trefense with a Gorka Pintado strike.

Bothroyd and Chopra were at it for Cardiff as they ran out 4-0 winners against Chase Town - though there are tougher ties ahead with Celtic and Valencia next up for the Bluebirds - and it was the same scoreline for the not-so-Super Hoops of QPR, who put 4 past Aldershot.

The 'goal bonanza`s came at Ipswich - whose kids chalked up 8 against Gorleston (the first team are away in Portugal) - whilst PNE did their usual goal fest pre-season trick, hitting Austrian part timers FC Hallein for 11 with everyone on the scoresheet (including Tom Finney no doubt).

In the 'most predictable pre-season friendly ever` Derby ram raided Burton Albion 1-0 at the Pirelli Stadium - you can`t help but think the new League 2 outfit were 'tyre`d of the sight of Nigel Clough.

Strangest event of pre-season so far is that BOTH Sheffield clubs are in Malta and we can only imagine that the nightlife is a lil` bit tasty there as United and Wednesday fans settle into the early evening sun for a spot on banter on the island… The Blades (aka Watford Reserves) won 1-0 against local outfit Floriana.

Up at the Riverside and Alves and Mido have both been fined for returning late to training and there`s good news for Spurs fans as Stuart Downing should be back in 6 weeks!!!!

No games for Bristol City, Plymouth (they`ve got Torquay on Wednesday) and the right royal shambles at Reading, who will probably have spent the weekend tapping up other teams players …

ALLEGEDLY.



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Writer:Dr Watford
Date:Monday July 13 2009
Time: 1:35PM

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6 Man Utd 38 18 15 5 69 25
7 Everton 38 17 10 11 61 18
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10 WBA 38 12 9 17 45 -8
11 West Ham 38 12 9 17 45 -17
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13 Stoke 38 11 11 16 44 -15
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16 Burnley 38 11 7 20 40 -16
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